Resurfacing
I have always been fairly lucky with exboyfriends, in that I won’t have to see them unless I plan on it. It is the byproduct of dating guys who don’t live in the same town/city as me. If I have to see them, I have plenty of warning, a train ride or the amount of time it’ll take them to get to me to prepare myself for the inevitable meeting.
It is rare that I will be walking down Fifth Avenue, listening to Bon Jovi on my iPod, totally minding my own business thinking about how a guy I met last summer just resurfaced this morning with an email on facebook. A guy I’m very interested in seeing again. I’m not particularly sure why I glanced to my right but when the hand was raised in a wave I barely could get a smile out with the shock that was registering through out my body.
There was D. Right beside his black car, which I checked to see if it was indeed his, as if it weren’t his subaru I might think I was seeing things. But it was him, putting his bike away after what he said after he kissed my cheek and held my hand a little longer than he should have, was his first bike ride of the summer in central park.
There was a bit of small talk before I took off, allowing him to kiss me on the cheek one more time and noticed him watching me as I left.
I was shaking as I walked through my door, just 5 blocks shy of my run in with D. He shook me to my core, caught me completely off guard in a way that I hate the most. He looked good, he was giving me those eyes I have seen before–the ones that usually precede the “I want to get back together speech.”
I can’t do this again.
Yet I want to know that I have been running circles in his mind tonight. That he saw me and realized again, what he’s missing out on.
In perfect timing, he has once again resurfaced back into my life, at the same distance from the breakup as existed in the past resurfaces. I hope I can keep him away, I hope I can be strong enough to resist his striking blue eyes which bore into me in the brief five minute exchange we had on the side of the street; that can ignore the way he touched me and smiled at me and waved as I walked away.
I need a shot of tequila. Who’s with me?
Is this the same D that broke your heart like 2 or 3 times? The one who broke up with you through email? The one you sent that “fuck you” email to?
Because if it is, then you need to step away from the fond memories. You CANNOT go back to him after being shafted by him so many times.
Um, what part of “do not contact me ever again” did he not understand? Why did he even talk to you for more than 1 min or a casual “hi” just ‘coz you bumped into him.
Ash, I know how hard it is. And if he had those eyes, then he was definitely thinking about how good you looked and how he wants you back.
But are you willing to put yourself back in that place?
you’re definitely a strong girl and you know what’s good and bad for you. stay strong… im down with the tequila
I’m up for some tequila!
Me! I’ll buy!
I’m in for the tequila.
Seeing an ex can stir up all types of good memories- that’s why you need to come home & remind yourself of the not-so-good ones..
I’m not gonna be subtle.
Nononononnonmnonnononnono.
You need something even stronger than tequila, or at least two shots of it.
No.
Oh Hell No.
Stay strong chica.
be strong….
…or be like me and move away! after the ex and i broke up on the eve of me moving home, i decided mere days later to move to DC. Three months later he moved to Asia. I got luckkkkyyy.
Why can’t everyone be as lucky as me to have their ex’s move to siberia (ok it was singapore not siberia but still…) because really? We don’t need that emotional distress everytime we run into them on accident. *le sigh*
Be strong!! Just think of every other time he wooed you then hurt you <3 you’re better than all of that. (ESPECIALLY better than someone who breaks up with you over email *insert angry eyes here*)
Hon. I have about 6 bottles of tequila in my house, allll with your name on them. I dont’ even know the background about D, but I’m gonna go ahead and scream DON’T.
The past always pops back up when you least expect it. Stay strong!
first of all? i dont do well with tequilla, but after hearing this story? YES, im with you. ill buy us several rounds.
those unplanned run-ins with exes are never fun. im sure he WAS in awe of how good you looked and were doing, and now? he sees what he f’d up and is missing out on.
be strong lady.