Second Thoughts
I always do this. I always second guess myself.
(Don’t worry, I’m not even giving a thought about getting back together with D, still shaken about seeing him last night but NOT doing that again. Promise.)
We were all sitting around the bride’s parents house, there were a few new faces but mainly old ones, who I have known for several years now. We were laughing, having a good time, enjoying each others company. We were reminiscing about our days at State, remembering the girl who tried to keep us from being friends with the bride, who told us she was a bitch, and finding out the groomsmen had possibly kissed her in spin the bottle.
I sat there, after talking to the bride’s father about why I didn’t really like NYC anymore (a conversation I’d had with multiple people that night since everyone was asking me how I liked NYC) and I got to thinking how much I’m going to miss these moments. These people. Especially if I move so far away to London.
When I told Sarah with an H that I had big news, first she asked when I was due, then she let me get out the news that I was moving to London. Her jaw didnt’ leave the floor for a good 10 minutes.
Talk of a Christmas party at the bride’s new home to play Wii tennis and bowling was thrown around. I will be attending since I should still be stateside at that point but its things like these I’m going to miss out on when I move away to London. I won’t be able to just fly back to michigan for a long weekend just to see my friends. A trip back to Michigan when I’m in London would mean a vacation, an investment. A lot of money shelled out for a long plane ride to Detroit.
So now I’m second guessing my decision to move abroad. Maybe I could keep it closer to home–move west instead of east. Seattle instead of London. So I don’t miss out on my bests in michigan, so I don’t miss out on family moments.
I’m second guessing my decision after my financial crisis last friday, where I had no money in the bank and in a situation where I couldn’t get any money, not even from my parents. I’m moving to the second most expensive city in the world, more expensive than NYC and didn’t I say I wanted to save money? Don’t I have the urge to buy a house, have something of my own? Be able to afford a nicer lifestyle? I won’t be getting that if I move to London.
But it is the opportunity of a lifetime. To move to London, see Europe like I always have wanted to do without shelling out 700 bucks a plane ticket and try to cram as much in as possible in a weeks time. I can experience a different culture, really become independent. Sure, London is a lot like NYC. Some people have said that. I don’t like NYC anymore and want a change, so maybe I won’t like London. But maybe it’ll be the change I need, maybe it isn’t as much like NYC as people say.
To stay in the States or flee abroad? That is a tough question that I thought I had the answer to.
I am AWFUL with decisions aren’t I?
That is a huge decision! Don’t be hard on yourself for taking the time to really weigh all your options and make sure it’s right. Whatever choice, whatever change you make, it will be a new experience and a new lesson. Also, what’s the worst that can happen? You decide you dont like it and you want another change, and so you do something different. That is the scary thing but also the fabulous thing!
I always second guess myself as well. This is a big decision though! Take your time and decide what is best for you. I know, with ample time, you’ll come up with a decision you feel comfortable with.
And like PP said, if it’s not right then you try something else!
Good luck!
Coin.
Flip.
Go.
No regrets!
Maybe you should move to Boston with me. Just sayin.
I definitely wouldn’t beat yourself up about second guessing yourself. Moving is not the kind of decision to make on a whim. Only after really thinking it through can you feel secure in what you are doing, so I say take your time. In the end, whatever you do, you’ll be happy you really thought it through.
it’s not like you’re deciding whether to go to McDs or Wendys. this is a BIG decision. the second guessing is natural.
personally, i say go. you can always come back if you get lonely, don’t like london, whatever. but if you don’t go you may always have that “what if”. it’s so much easier to come back than to leave… i say do it now. while you’re excited about it. it sounds like a great time in your life to do this… i would do something like this if i weren’t pretty much settled down. i always wanted to do something like this and i know i wish i’d done it before now. so i may be biased, but i say Go and have a great time!
It is a big decision where you need to weigh all options, so don’t feel bad if you waiver. It would be so much fun to live abroad and travel Europe. At the same time it’s hard to leave friends and family behind.
If you end up changing your mind and staying in the US, you could always save up for a big European trip where you travel around for a month. I’d love to do that!
Second guessing this kind of decision is totally justified. I’ve been back and forth about moving- whether to stay in Chicago or go to Boston. & it seems as if everyday I decide on something else. It’s tough! Big decision! But keep in mind that if something doesn’t work, you can always change it. At least that’s what I keep telling myself!
You wouldn’t be a responsible adult if you didn’t question what it would be like for you living there. But, I think that London would be one of those crazy fantastic experiences that would be a highlight in your life!
GO.
Find a job, be broke, travel all over Europe. Who cares if you hate it after a year and move back to the States? You will have gone, survived, and will appreciate more being able to take a quick weekend to go home.
And also, if you live in London, people will visit YOU.
you should go. you HAVE to go! it’s london! in college i got to travel, and london is incredible.
i think if you can get the job, and the funds to go, then you should. because you know what, you can always come back. ALWAYS. if you hate it after 2 months, leave. i’m planning a big move myself, and i have to keep repeating this over and over…
i think you’ll really like it. there’s something really great about being on your own. finally. you know?
i know it’s far. but it’s an incredible opportunity. and you will definitely regret it. and always wonder what if.
and you can always come back home.
in my personal opinion it is better to have friends and family close by and in your life than anything else. I could get by without them but why would I want to. But I also love where I live and will never leave.
Maybe you could try to make a global job search if you’re really not sure about London. When you get the right job in an acceptable place, go there. But yeah, you will definitely not be moving to greater buying power there.
do it!!! london is amazing! yeah, it’s expensive as crap and the dollar-pound ratio is ridiculous, but you won’t regret it! you’ll be able to see so much while you are there!
I think…really sit down and weigh out the pros and cons.
If you want, I’ll sit with you. I’m good at helping other people make decisions and see things clearly. Just not myself.
What about committing to moving for just a year? That solves a few of these problems, maybe…
I don’t even think about this as second guessing, I see it more about weighing the pros and cons and trying to make an informed decision. I think it’s smart. You should do whatever makes you happiest.
I think committing to do it for a year and see how it goes is a good compromise. That way you know you’ll try hard to make it work but you still have an out if it’s just not for you.
It doesn’t have to be a forever decision.
You will never lose your best friends or family. Instead you can only make MORE friends if you move to London.
Sure its expensive, sure it can be like NYC at times. But view the London stint as a launching pad in your life as opposed to a destination. Who knows, while working in London, you won’t come across a design firm based out of Milan, who would want to hire you? A year in Milan? What can be better than that for a student of fashion??!
You are NOT awful at making decisions. And you are not the only one who second-guesses your decisions. I do it all the time, and I believe that most people are this way at some point in their lives. So, don’t worry. Why don’t you do the whole Pros & Cons list for Seattle and London, and see which way things fall?
It would be fun to say I had a friend in London, and maybe even visit (ha! now i sound like a stalker or something!).